McKenzie Lee Is Shaking Things Up!

Former Club Jenna contract girl McKenzie Lee came back from retirement in October when she signed an exclusive contract with Digital Playground, a studio that recently signed Kayden Kross, formerly of Adam & Eve, as a contract girl.

However, McKenzie's contract didn't last all that long, and she and Digital Playground parted ways in the beginning of December, with both parties stating that the dissolution of the contract was harmonious. McKenzie's current career goals include her feature dancing, running two websites that need content, and starting her own adult talent agency, and in an interview with AVN, McKenzie expressed that in order to focus on attaining her goals, it was clear that she needed to dissolve her contract.

While it's only been a couple of weeks since she left Digital Playground, and it's obvious that this sultry Brit means business! Today, a press release from McKenzie Lee stated that she will be launching her talent agency, Bella Dolce Stars, after the AVN Awards in January. The agency is licensed and bonded, and it is also the only agency (at the time of this post) to provide all signed talent with a comprehensive health plan, which includes health, dental, and vision insurance, as well as access to "a program that provides counseling for alcohol, chemical dependency, and family counseling."

In the release, McKenzie says, "I started this agency, because I just wanted some change within the industry. Before I was signed to my contract with Club Jenna, I didn't have ability to obtain insurance, and we all know how important this is. I have worked long and hard to obtain this package and I truly believe this will make life better for performers in the industry."

Fist Of Fear, Touch Of Death

What do half naked women, paint, a camera and high school mascot heads have in common?? Not much until Morgan Slade works his magic and Frankensteins them piece by piece into beautiful works of mixed media art. Mr. Slade is working on his upcoming show Fist Of Fear, Touch Of Death at the Shooting Gallery. What makes his works so uncommon is the process that is undertaken to birth a finished piece.
Staring with a group of fetching and titillating minimally dressed woman, Slade poses, paints and shoots them. After the photography is completed he then gets down and dirty printing the photos on archival digital proofing prints and goes at them with sand paper, gloss, paint and even the occasional gold leaf. The culminated work is a sexy madness suitable for any wall. Morgan Slade's works will be available for viewing at the Shooting Gallery Jan. 9th-30th.

Have A Sexy Party,

.Stinky Britches.

Don't Burn The Messenger

Shopping season is upon us and there are an infinite amount of new gadgets and gizmos to satisfy even the prudest tastes. It seems in these uber connected, check your cell every 2 minutes day and age messages and suggestive advertising can be found all around us... Well how about even in your breakfast. That's right, some breakfast savant conjured up a toaster that you can literally write messages on and then the contraption transfers that message on to your wheat toast dry with strawberry jam on the side. Just think of the possibilities... you could tell that cheap ass roommate of yours to stop leaving his crispy finger nail clippings all over the bathroom counter. Or remind that special someone that last night in the jacuzzi the thing she did with her elbow felt great or remind her that this morning was even hotter but never to put her finger in there again or she'll lose it. Ok, so we've established that the possibilities are endless only limited by... well by nothing, you could even draw something on your toast. I look forward to the day when a manager can walk into sales person's cubicle and instead of a pink slip they receive a slice of 10 grain with "You're Shit Canned" on it. That way the unlucky peon can enjoy a tasty snack as he or she is escorted out of the building by security. Don't forget your stapler, it's a Swingline!

It appears this message making influenza is not limited to breakfast fare and has spread to plants. This holiday season you can nab yourself a plant as a gift that has a short phrase laser etched into its ungerminated seed. When the plant grows and eventually flowers the message can be read large and in charge on the side of the sepal or base of the flower in general speak. This will, with no doubt in my mind make your mom or lady friend start crying with joyous love especially if you pick up the plant pictured below.
Stay thirsty my friends,
.Stinky Britches.

Adam & Eve Signs One Star And Prepares To Lose One

Adam & Eve Pictures announced on November 12th that they had signed the one and only Teagan Presley as their newest contract girl. Both parties were extremely enthusiastic about the signing of the performer, and who wouldn't be ecstatic about signing one of the hottest female performers or joining the ranks of AEP's contract girls, which includes Bree Olson and newcomer Alexis Ford.

"Teagan's an incredible performer. We have always been impressed not only with her beauty and amazing sex scenes, but also with her dedication and professionalism," said Meredith Christopher, AEP's Head of Production, in a recent press release. "After seeing her recent work in the skinworXXX movies Sun Goddess: Malibu and Deviance, we immediately began negotiations to get her exclusively with Adam & Eve."

Teagan, a former Digital Playground contract girl, has been shooting movies this past year with skinworXXX, a company that she co-owns with Deviance co-star Eva Angelina and director/executive producer Joshua, and while she would have been happy to continue working solely for skinworXXX, she jumped at the chance to sign with AEP. In an interview with AVN, Teagan said, "When Adam & Eve approached me about expanding my exclusivity to AEP, I was shocked and thrilled! Girl/girl stars don't get a lot of contracts these days, but Adam & Eve saw that my onscreen intensity and performances haven't changed, just the sex of my partners!"

And just as Teagan is excited about her future with a new studio, AEP contract girl Kayden Kross is feeling the same way about Digital Playground. On November 17th, DP announced that on January 1, 2010, Kayden Kross will become their newest contract girl. In a press release from DP, Kayden said, "I am really excited for the opportunity to be a part of their original content and believe that I can add another fresh, new dimension to the company."

Regardless of what studio they're contracted with, I think it's safe to say that their fans just want to see both Teagan and Kayden happy and horny! For those who want a taste of what's to come from the Kayden/DP relationship, check out Deeper 9, and for those who want to see the action that made AEP take notice of Teagan Presley, check out Deviance.

Twitter Me This!

So obviously I haven't been writing all that much this week but fuck this takes a lot of effort. So I'm going to half ass this one too... Enjoy! There is this great new invention called the Internet! On this "Internet" people have the opportunity to post informative, educational and entertaining material. While most of the Internet is delegated to sites that cost $2.99 a month, make my right arm and wrist tired there are a few that are simply, for lack of better words witty and effervescent. I came across something special, this site or "page" falls under the gargantuous Twitter umbrella and is called "Shit My Dad Says". The title explains it all, a young man 29 years of age who happens to still live at home with his mother and 73 year old father writes down the nutty shit that spews forth from his dads jowls. Small blerps of elderly genius that only appear in the most seasoned and salty of geriatric candidates. These small blessings normally come daily and will with no doubt in my mind make you smile even if just for a brief moment whether simply from the pureness of the comedy or the comparable memory it creates from shit your own dad says.

eg. "Sometimes life leaves a hundred dollar bill on your dresser, and you don't realize until later that it's because it fucked you."

Besos,

.Stinky Britches.

Casa Surf Project

Oh Laguna Beach you have spawned so many illustrious television shows and tumultuous cat fights over the years. What could you possibly have to offer us now besides marvelous art and a stupendous little beach community? What's that you say? Gloriously designed hotels, sculpted by some of the best in the Surf / Skate/ Fashion Industry... well now that is a pleasant surprise that even Kristin Cavallari and LC would have to agree on. Just the fact that I have referenced the MTV show Laguna Beach in my blog makes me extremely depressed and disheartened in the strength of my own soul. Uhhh... now my thoughts are slightly discombobulated and I feel inebriated to the point of becoming ill.




Back to the legitimate subject of this post, The Casa Surf Project! Riviera Magazine paired up with the La Casa del Camino Hotel and allowed 10 of Southern California's premier surf/skate/ fashion designers to go to town on several rooms in the hotel. The companies that were fortunate enough to participate are; Billabong, Roxy, Glaceau, Etnies, ...Lost, Quiksilver, L*Space, Rip Curl and Riviera Mag. What they created is surprisingly eloquent but at the same time a testament to the maturity and growth that the action sports community has undergone. 10 years ago if you gave ...Lost free reign on a hotel room you better hope that you have great insurance because something or someone would probably catch on fire and your hotel may or may not end up condemned. At very least you would be left with a powerful odor that stings the nostrils. Fast forward 10 year to today and you get a romantic villa inspired hotel room. To check out all of the great rooms hit up Casa Surf Project. The overall best part is that these rooms are available to anyone so maybe one day you can brag to your sewing circle about getting freaky naughty in the Billabong room.



May I politely raid your mini bar?



.Stinky Britches.

  

Not Your Normal Tree House

A tree falls in your backyard... does it make a sound? Yup and it makes a kick ass tree house! Well at least it did when a tree fell in the backyard of a Brentwood estate owned by an art lover and philanthropist. Rockefeller Partners Architects went to town when a 40 foot pine tree went down for the count. But instead of chopping up this prepubescent pinewood derby car the still living tree was incorporated into a glorious structure that is more art than domicile. At Only 172 sq. ft. you're probably thinking they just jammed a Murphy bed and ran a hose up there so the guest had a place to sleep and some water to rinse off their down belows... Nope, this dainty dwelling has a bed, office, microwave, fridge and even a crapper to keep its guests happy. However, if you enjoy belting out the latest hot single from Miss Spears while showering be ready to share your larynx love with the neighbors because you be havin an outdoor shower yo!

Other than the fact you might get caught scrubbing your dirties by the neighbors this has to be one of the most well designed "tree houses" in so cal.



Besos,

.Stinky Britches.

Republicans Boycott Climate Change Committee

Yes yes, I do know that this is my second political post in a row and I know that they are boring as women's basketball but I'm having trouble wrapping my melon around today’s political climate. The more I read about the political party divide in our country the less I can comprehend how these childish politicians get elected year after year. On Tuesday there was a Senate Committee hearing discussing a bill dealing with green house gas emissions. The committee is made up of 7 Republicans and 12 Democrats and was set to tackle a very important emissions bill so the committee can send it on its way to the full Senate for a vote. Well guess who decided to boycott the meeting... (Yes I know you read the title of this post so you already know) the Republicans. Actually 1 Republican did show up, who really cares what his name is at this point but he did show up for a few minutes to read the opening statements then he bailed. The Democrats are still waiting for the Republicans to magically appear and discuss this important topic that in one way or another will affect every single American.


So those are the facts, here is my question. How in the feck does not showing up for a meeting that will affect all of your constituents contribute to healthy government and ultimately a healthy America? (I use the term "healthy" in both a literal and figurative sense) The bill does have to do with green house gas emissions and climate change after all so health should fit in there somewhere. We are paying these politicians to run our government, their job is to make America run smoothly and make sure we continue to be the "Greatest nation in the world". How does not showing up for your job help? I understand that the 2 parties don't agree on this emissions bill but that's the derivative of the committee, come to an agreement through negotiation. You know... the old give and take, sharing is caring that we learned in kindergarten. Now, I know every politician answers to a higher power… aka corporations. Through lobbyists whose only job is to make sure the influential politicians vote in their corporations favor by dipping their putrid black mitts so far in their pockets they're practically giving them a reach around. Whewwwww! I feel good knowing that my government is hard at work with our best interests in mind. Today was election day so I hope that if you voted it was a researched informed decision and for a politician that is mature enough to think of more than their party's ideals and maybe care if only a little for the good of America and the citizens they represent.


Where are the lobbyists for the American people??

.Stinky Britches.
P.S. I promise no more politics for a while.

New Sensations Porn Spoofs - Only at ADE!

We are pumped to announce an amazing new arrangement with New Sensations - a huge leap in the continuous efforts we are making as we constantly strive to improve all aspects of our VOD product for you.... we are now the exclusive Video On Demand destination for New Sensations popular series of porn parodies.

New Sensations’ takes a fresh approach to the porn parody craze that seems never ending in a market that is demand driven - but they have put a modern spin on it - choosing to spoof only mainstream hits that resonate with a younger audience. New Sensations also has a knack for finding spot on talent that literally nail their name sake roles again and again.

New Sensations parodies are now available for Download to Own, Streaming Rental and Download Rental and the titles include ‘70’s Show: A XXX Parody, Friends: A XXX Parody, The Office: A XXX Parody, Seinfeld: A XXX Parody, 30 Rock: A XXX Parody, Scrubs: A XXX Parody, and brand new release Entourage: A XXX Parody, as well as Digital Sin’s The Sex Files: A Dark XXX Parody. See for yourself right now - http://www.adultdvdempire.com/porn-videos/93463/new-sensations-parodies-studios.html?partner_id=10009154!

Saber Fires Up Fox News!!

The Democratic National Committee (DNC) recently hosted a health care reform video contest. The DNC chose 20 finalist's videos and one in particular has given Fox News some material and ammo against Obama’s Health Care Reform Video Contest. Well known graffiti artist Saber created the video that has the panties of the Conservative Right wingers wedged so far up their butts they can taste elastic. The video shows Saber painting an American flag then tagging some key health care reform messages over the flag. Fox News chose to see this as the DNC condoning the desecration of the American Flag and is doing their dandiest to create black clouds over the health care reform debate. My opinions may vary from yours and we have the right to disagree but Fox News must be run by some salty old curmudgeons with nothing better to do with their time then come up with new ways to hurt our country by creating a bullshit haze that blocks the real issues. If you choose to watch Fox for something other than the Simpsons and you happen upon the Fox News Channel watch and see how much "actual news" is shown. Not opinions given by their Muppet news casters. You'll be surprised how much content you receive. Oh yeah, and what about when an American Flag's image is used on underwear and you spend all day rubbing your gooch against them? Or what if you shit your pants? Isn't that desecrating the flag too? Come on Fox loosen up! Try putting more effort into real issues instead of creating useless non-news worthy material. Big up to Saber for making the top 20!!

Fair and Balanced my Balls...

.Stinky Britches.

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Sunshine On My Shoulders Makes Me Happy

Smart design = Eco Friendly design and there is no lack of the combo of the two in today’s rapidly expanding products. Photovoltaic cells are showing up in a plethora of items; cell phones, roofing tiles, even clothing. I'm not too sure about that fashion statement but shoots you never know (80's pop colors came back and those were the scary years so solar panel shirts could become the new fresh flannel pattern). At least photovoltaic cells are showing up in areas that they can actually be useful like the above pack by Voltaic. A company dedicated to fusing form and functionality they are incorporating solar cells into their packs so the "user" or "wearer" can keep all their nifty gadgets powered up so you'll never miss a phone call due to a dead battery. They even have a laptop back that can help keep you charged up so you're not missing that important email or Facebook update... To make things even more Eco Friendly the intelligent folks at Voltaic are using 100% post consumer PET plastic fabrics to construct these fantabulously shocking carry alls. Check em out at Voltaic Systems

Smell That,
.Stinky Britches.

Economy Shmeshmonomy

Hey you... is the US economy doing better?


Fuck!!! Like you I have no clue either. I've stopped wearing chonies to save money on my laundry.



What I have noticed are twisted little glimpses into the frothing bowels of how economic downturn affects the norm. Now, coming from the west coast and shredding the gnar out in the water almost on a daily basis (thanks unemployment for this great opportunity to improve my surfing) I've found a great way to measure unemployment in CA or any state with a solid population of active ocean users. Over the past few months I've noticed a direct correlation between the unemployment % and the shitty fuckin crowd that has appeared almost magically in the middle of the day when most people should be hard at work diligently updating their Facebook accounts, "Is it Friday yet?" NO! Fuckelstein it's Wednesday be grateful you have the means to be considered a viable additive to the workforce.

Whoa... sorry about that I need to read my Zen book again and calm the fuck down. So anywho, it's not scientific method but there is a strong correlation between the number of heads in the water mid day to the unemployment rate. I'm just making useful observations.

Lets hope for empty line ups.

Kiss kiss,
.Stinky Britches.

Livin Large In Singapore

It seems that Singapore has a little something for everyone.  Beautiful tropical beaches, comfortable climate, friendly locals, a rich history, ...lady boys but who would have thunk Singapore as the place to go for magnificent home architecture.  Take a peek at the 4 story bungalow above, designed by Aamer Architects.  This ginormous bungalow sits only a few blocks from the beach in a hood called Queen Astrid Park.  Now I haven't had the overwhelming joy of ransacking and plundering Singapore for its booze and women (yet) but I can only imagine that Queen Astrid Park is the equivalent to Beverly Hills or "The Hills" to use the parlance of our time.  This behemoth connects its living spaces by walkways that take the person fortunate enough to be inside her on a journey through courtyards and some of the several water features on the property.  I'm sure this place has seen its fair share of brunzed boobies lying out by the pool... Check out LivingPod for more insane homes and design ideas.

I think it's time for a Singapore trip.

Wen wen,

.Stinky Britches.

Graffiti Is The New Black

Graff and street art have been around since before the ancient Egypians constructed the pyramids but over the past decade it seems like it is finally getting noticed as "true" art by the mainstream.  Simply writing your name on a wall or sign has come a long way.  Check the above pic of a huge piece I shot in NY by Banksy.  Pretty redonkulous when you think that he had to hit this 3 story building while avoiding the fuzz... There are several colabs of graff artists out there that are enciting havok on a nightly basis (and sometimes daily basis, if they have the fun factories).  The Seventh Letter brings together some of the best on the street. Revok, Retna, Reyes, Ewok, just to name a few.  It's great to see these guys taking their art to the next level and getting recognition from galleries, museums and brands like Luis Vutton and Marc Jacobs.  Keep up the good work kids.

Is This Real Life?

David , star of ‘David After Dentist,’ my favorite YouTube video of all time - is a man wise beyond his years and poses a mind boggling question; ‘Is This Real Life’?  This is the same question that I have asked myself over and over again for the past few days with 2 very confusing stories that have come to light.

1.  Marge Simpson to pose for Playboy.  YUP – weird right?  You know what is even weirder??  All of the freaking freaks out there who are going to get off on this shit.  Apparently there is a market for it too - Google Simpsons Porn if you don’t believe me.  DISCLAIMER – Google at your own risk – your monitor may implode as it loads content only a sick witch doctor could be responsible for. 
2. Shauna Sand has a sex tape.  Not necessarily surprising as I’d say she fits the stereotypical pornstar mold – Lucite platform heels, huge fake boobs, a meth-like plastic surgery addiction – but somehow in my head, Shauna Sand looks more like a cartoon than Marge Simpson which brings me full circle in the pondering of David’s question, 'Is This Real Life'?  Shauna’s butt is cute I will give her that – but I’d much prefer an announcement of a sex tape with a real celebrity that I haven’t seen naked a million times – and how about a little emotion Shauna??  If you are going to tape you and your lover in the act - in high-def quality I might add - you are begging for someone to sell this shit so at least crack a smile or wink at the camera for us.

See all of VIVID’s celeb sex tapes here.

Porn Goes Green

Bangbus Goes Green - watch more funny videos

Huge Wieners!!

Who doesn't like a huge wiener! I love em! Especially when they start with a bacon wrapped hot dog, baked beans, lettuce, jalapenos, nacho cheese, shredded jack cheese, grilled unions all wrapped up in a sweet bun that can barely containing the overflowing goodness it holds within. I had the opportunity to experience two (yes two, I can eat!) of these delectable nitratesicles a few nights ago. My good friend Foco Sequedos is the master chef creating these bovine gut busters and they are glorious. I've got to post a warning though, if you ever are privileged enough to throw one of these wieners in your mouth make sure you have a coldie or two to wash it down. If not... Alka Seltzer and a few Hail Mary's should do the trick.

Overweight besos,

Stinky Britches.

Wishing, Hoping & Praying

Porn Power Couple Tera Patrick and Evan Seinfeld of Teravision, Iron Cross and VH1 reality show fame have announced and confirmed their split. In an official statement they said they will continue to work together as business partners and remain best of friends.

I wanted to take a minute to wish Tera and Evan the best of luck…I hope their breakup really is as amicable as the press is reporting... I pray that Tera returns to her roots and starts fucking guys again…other than YOU Evan! We want you back Tera –we’ve really missed seeing penises going into your legendary vagina. We’ve been really patient – it’s time to reward your fans and explode with a comeback – a fucking vengeance!

The Porn Oscars

September in the World of Porn is a very exciting month.  Every year around this time, adult studios bang out their best movies – scrambling to get them released just in time to be considered for the AVN Awards.  Some of your most prized porn collection pieces may have even been in this situation a year or so ago.  Pirates from Digital Playground is a solid example of my point - a September 2005 release that won a huge load of awards and is still sitting pretty on our all-time bestsellers list.

 Anyways around here we affectionately refer to these as our Huge Fall Releases.  Take a look at this year’s list - watch their trailers for a tasty teaser and see if you agree with our top picks for boner-fide AVN award-winning contenders.

Clap Your Hands For Your Crapper!

So this one definitely falls under the random category... After a brief stint with some sort of stomach flu I became closely acquainted and developed a new found respect for my toilet. I don't know exactly what was wrong with me but about a week ago my belly started rumbling and something didn't feel right. Lets just say things were flowing a little too freely if you catch my drift! Anywho, my mystery dysentery bonded me closely with my porcelain pal and it got me thinking more and more about how paramount the toilet is to our society and maybe how we often take the inconspicuous crapper for granted. Now, I could write 20 pages on the history and importance of the toilet to modern society but that would be a pain in the ass that probably wouldn't hold your interest. So here are a couple questions to think about the next time you pop a squat and get ready to drop a healthy fudge dragon.

Well, first why are toilets usually white? Second, why is the handle usually placed on the left side of the tank? Finally, why are public toilet seats a horseshoe instead of a complete oval like the ones we have at home? I've looked up these questions and some of the answers actually make some sense while a few are simply bull shit.

Check out Toilet Inspector and see a few interesting names that have been given to the crapper over the years.

Don't push too hard you'll blow an O-ring.

.Stinky Britches.

Go Fedora Yourself!

For me hats have always been a key piece in an otherwise pop-less mundane wardrobe. So today I'm featuring one of the hottest/ oldest hat manufacturers in the U.S. Goorin Bros. has been around since 1895 and they have been crafting unique head wear their entire existence. Hot Kicks and a fresh hat can easily turn a "t-shirt and Levis" into Friday night material. So it's important to rock something stylish. Now you're asking yourself "Bro! Is my Yankee hat that I rock all crisp with the stickers still on it cool"? Your answer; Sure but only if you're a rapper! As for the rest of us working a bcap might not cut it. Try a fedora like the Bohemian above. Odds are you'll be the only bro brah at the club with something this nice on their crown.

Besos,

.Stinky Britches.

Hand Soap... Literally.

Check out these "hand soaps"!!! I just think these things are the greatest tool of good hygiene ever created. Imagine how good showers and baths will become when you have these hands giving you a rub down. The soaps even come in different skin tones so you can experience what it feels like to get a soapy HJ from a different ethnicity on a daily basis. Don't forget the shock value of these little phalanges. Make sure you put these in the guest bathroom before the in laws come for a visit. Nothing says "You're welcome to stay as long as you want" like a bakers dozen of these guys scattered randomly in the bathroom. Tactical digits pointing to the ceiling calling to them, wanting them, inviting them into your home... Check out A+R Store for more info.

Get Soapy,

.Stinky Britches.

Heyday Footwear: Super Shift... Premium

Every wonder to yourself, "Hey what are the funki freshest kicks on the market"? Well you don't have to strain what little braincells you have left trying to find out because here they are. The new Super Shift "Premium" by Heyday Footwear. High grade tumbled leather, Python and a limited quantity make these kicks harder to get inside of than Megan Fox. Slide on in at heydayfootwear.com

Enjoy,

.Stinky Britches.

What Are You Afraid Of?

With the daily barrage of so much scary shit in the news everyday it can be hard to define exactly what you are afraid of in this ricockulous world we live in. Terrorism, a flu that came from the other white meat, our glorious economy or maybe you're afraid of something as simple as chickens. Yes you heard right fuckin pluckin chickens! There is no shortage of things to be afraid of, here are a few of the more interesting phobias that you may have and not even know it.

• Angrophobia- A fear of being angry.
• Ablutophobia- A fear of bathing (I always sit next to someone with this on planes).
• Pogonophobia- A fear of Beards (Sorry hipsters, time to bust out the razor).
• Omphalophobia- A fear of belly buttons (Don't look down...).
• Melanophobia- A fear of black (White people I'm looking in your direction on this one).
• Defecaloesiophobia- A fear of bowel movements (Well maybe after enchilada night).
• Alektorophobia- A fear of Chickens (RIP Col. Sanders).
• Coulrophobia- A fear of clowns (Ever since that damn movie IT).
• Dentophobia- A fear of the dentist (Who doesn't have this).
• Xerophobia- A fear of dryness (Where's the lotion).
• Medorthophobia- A fear of boners (Every girl friend in high school).
• Kolpophobia- A fear of female genitals (Genitalia!!).
• Barophobia- A fear of gravity (Good luck if you have this).
• Acrophobia- A fear of heights (See Omphalophobia).

It's okay to have fear, actually it's human nature to recognize and deal with fear (fight or flight). However, it does come down to how you manage and process your fears. If you deal with fear in a healthy way your daily life is unaffected and you can go on living life like 99% of the population. If you fall into that 1% of people who simply let their lives become overrun by their fears well I'm sorry for you... get help. And if you have Panophobia- A fear of everything best of luck to ya slick! To find out what your fears are called checkout http://www.phobialist.com/
Hugs and Kisses,
Stinky Britches.